Saturday, September 11, 2010
Dragged myself out of bed and drove into Toronto for the Movers and Shakers conference. It took all my resolve to get there. I’d signed up for the conference because they were giving advice on book publishing, key ideas for workshops and public speaking, marketing, developing and delivering a compelling message, communicating effectively to a wide audience, etc. which I imagined would be helpful as I move forward in my career. However, as I sat there on Saturday, I wondered if there was another reason for being there. Because at that point in time my focus was Maggie and thinking about my future career was a struggle.
I’d spent the week pondering the spiritual aspect of what was happening with Maggie. What’s the higher purpose to all of this? Recognizing that it was important not to go into ‘spiritual bypass’ and totally ignore the human/animal paths we were both on. To allow my spirituality to assist, but not take me away from, my human grieving. I felt there was something that I was meant to do with this journey we were on. For my sake, for Maggie’s sake, and for the sake of others. But for the life of me I had no clue what it was.
As I was sitting there listening to Cheryl talk about Blogs I thought of the movie, Julie and Julia with Meryl Streep. That was really my only experience with Blogs. I thought about how Julie had written every day in her Blog and the impact it had had on others. The idea of doing something like that about the journey Maggie, Tara and I were on came to mind. I thought about how little support there is for people who are going through similar experiences and began to wonder, ‘what if I were to share this?’ What if I let people know that it’s OK to grieve. That it’s OK to feel, no matter how painful that is. What if my sharing helps someone do that. What if it takes a little of the stigma away and opens up the healing process. Is that why I’ve spent so much time over the last few years studying grieving, bereavement, palliative care, and tieing in spirituality? Yes, it’s helping me as I grieve for my Dad who died this May, but maybe there’s another reason. As I thought about it more and more I got more and more excited. When I first got the idea, I got goose bumps — my sign that I’m truly connected and on the right path.
I went home and thought about it and the next day mentioned it to a few friends and colleagues who were at the conference. They thought it was a great idea. Everyone I have since spoken with thinks it’s a great idea. So that was the spark that started this blog. I must admit that sharing my personal feelings and experiences with the world is a little overwhelming to say the least. However, the feeling that Maggie is also supportive of this makes it easier.
I must express huge gratitude to Cheryl Richardson and to Reid Tracy for getting me started on this journey. I’m not sure where it will take Maggie, Tara, and I and know that the ride will be painful, joyful, grounding, scary, exciting, and that every human emotion will be experience. I have no doubt that I will grow from it — as a human and spiritually. I’m already meditating more 🙂 If you are reading this, I thank you for sharing the journey with us and hope, in my heart of hearts, that it helps you along your journey, wherever that may lead you.